Arama They Didn't

11:47 am - 02/06/2013

Chinese Family Ashamed After Little Japanese Boy’s Visit

From Douban:

A little Japanese child came to our home, and embarrassed our entire family


Please patiently read until the end, because what I have to say is definitely not one of those comparisons between the living and learning capabilities of Chinese and Japanese children you often see online.

Recently my second cousin who married in Japan and her Japanese husband returned to her side of the family on a visit, bringing with them a little Japanese child, apparently the child of her Japanese husband’s relative who was very interested in China and so came along with them. My second cousin, her husband, and the Japanese child all stayed at my cousin’s home, because my cousin’s son is about the same age as the Japanese child, and they could be playmates.



The Japanese kid’s name was Jun Fu, who had just begun first grade, and looked rather gentle and delicate. With his glasses, he looks rather like the main character Nobi from Doraemon. He speaks a little bit of Chinese but with it being his first time in a strange country and meeting this many strangers whose speech he doesn’t understand, he was a little nervous. Still, seeing our amiable smiles, Jun Fu very politely bowed to each and every one of us, greeting us with very stiff Chinese.

Truly, we all adored this little Japanese kid, so we were all very nice to him.

However, my cousin’s son Peng Peng, who is currently in third grade, was full of hostility towards Jun Fu. Peng Peng knew early on that Jun Fu was Japanese, so when he met him, the very first thing he did was raise his little fist, and the first thing he said was: “Down with Little Japan!”

Jun Fu didn’t understand “Down with Little Japan”, but he was confused to see Peng Peng raise his fist. Of course, Peng Peng didn’t hit him either, only intending to scare him a bit, and Jun Fu was scared so much the color of his face changed.

My cousin hurriedly pulled Peng Peng to a side, rebuking him that this is a guest and he must not be impolite! Unexpectedly, Peng Peng began crying, saying the teacher said, “Japanese people are Chinese people’s enemy, you are all unpatriotic!”

I also explained to him that what the teacher is referring to is history, but now Japan is currently improving relations with China, and that the Japanese kid who has come to our home is kind-hearted and our friend.

Peng Peng became even angrier, saying: “Then why just recently daddy and mommy were talking about how Japan stole China’s land and we should boycott Japanese goods everyday? Our teacher at school recently had us watch an educational cartoon, which was all about us bringing down Japanese imperialism!”

That day, Peng Peng continuously glared at Jun Fu with enmity.

Jun Fu however truly was a kind-hearted, well-behaved child. Later when I went over to my cousin’s home, I heard my cousin say that Jun Fu always keeps his things nice and tidy in his suitcase, never needs prodding to wash his face and brush his teeth, and even knows to wash his underwear and socks on his own everyday. Because he was embarrassed to have my cousin help him hang it up to dry, he carefully hung them on the towel rack n the balcony. When it came to meals, Jun Fu would look at those older in the house. Seeing his elders pick up their chopsticks, he would then look to my second-cousin, waiting for her to say something in Japanese, probably that it was time to eat, before he would pick up his own bowl and chopsticks.

Chinese parents really do like comparing their children to other people’s children, this cannot be denied. My cousin said she really wished Peng Peng was as thoughtful and easy to take care of as Jun Fu, having grown accustomed to picking up various kinds of garbage that Peng Peng leaves behind, cleaning and tidying up after him, doing this and that for him, with Peng Peng taking the best portions of food for himself as if that is how things are supposed to be, while they too give Peng Peng the best portions, spoiling him. But seeing how well-behaved, considerate, and polite Jun Fu was, even letting elders go first when eating, my cousin couldn’t help but say to Peng Peng from time to time: “Look at how that little brother so and so.”

Really, the way Japanese families and schools educate their children is just so different from the way China does. I really wonder if it is because of [differences in] overall social norms.

Little by little, this thoroughly exasperated Peng Peng.

The second day Jun Fu was here, Jun Fu friendly shared took his remote control car out and gave it to Peng Peng to play with. [Seeing this, I thought to myself,] Perhaps sharing was a part of the education they [Japanese children] receive. But on the third day, my cousin saw parts of the remote control car scattered all over Peng Peng’s room. She asked what happened, and Peng Peng viciously relied: “Boycott Japanese goods!”

From then on Jun Fu never shared his toys with Peng Peng again, and began keeping his distance from Peng Peng.

On the fourth day after Jun Fu’s arrival, Peng Peng finally changed his attitude, and became friendly with Jun Fu. It seems like children’s natures are inherently kind after all, and they’re willing to make friends. They first exchanged their names, with Peng Peng engrossed in learning Japanese pronunciation, while Jun Fu happily said “Peng Peng, “friends”, and other Chinese words. Peng Peng also took out his toy cars and gave them to Jun Fu to play. We could see that Jun Fu was very happy, so all the parents were also very much relieved.

To our great surprise, on the very last night that Jun Fu was at my cousin’s home, something happened that shocked and embarrassed our entire family.

That night, my parents, cousin and her husband, uncle and aunt, and I were all watching TV in the living room. My second cousin and her Japanese husband had gone out to do some shopping. Peng Peng brought Jun Fu out to the living room and while looking quite pleased with himself, he said Jun Fu had something to say to us.

Then Jun Fu, his cheeks blushing, hands fidgeting, smilingly and bashfully said something in his awkward Chinese:

“I’m a damn Jap! I’m sorry to all Chinese!”

Everyone was stunned.

Jun Fu saw the looks on our faces, and stood there, not knowing what to do.

My cousin finally found herself, immediately smiled, wrapped Jun Fu in her arms and rubbed his hair [as if nothing was wrong], while her husband went up and dragged Peng Peng into the bathroom where “smack” a slap was heard, the hit making even my heart tremble.

I thought, I now know what had happened.

It had to have been Peng Peng who taught Jun Fu to say those words, and Jun Fu must have thought what Peng Peng taught him to say was something we would appreciate hearing, probably like thanking us or that it was a pleasant stay in China and the like.

After Jun Fu left, my cousin’s family reflected deeply on how they raised their kid. At the same time, they were sad and worried about how such a little child could have such hate towards Japan bordering on the pathological in his bones. My second cousin said, as far as she knew, Japanese kids don’t have a very bad impression of China and would never have thought that today’s Chinese kids would have such deep-rooted hate.

Perhaps it is time for our patriotic education to be more objective. Our anti-Japanese sentiments should be softened too. Children are impressionable. Their hearts should be pure and good. When he sees his own compatriots setting fire to Japanese car dealers, smashing Japanese cars, surrounding and vandalizing JUSCO, or when the education in school involves instilling anti-Japanese hate, his patriotism has already begun becoming twisted. Furthermore, when recently there have even been people posting online about spraying themselves with Borancit [a Viagara type of product] and raping Japanese women into extinction, there is even less morality and rationality to be said.

Perhaps there will people who will read this and say, “Never forget national humiliation, this is exactly how children should be educated from when they are small!” But for some reason, in the face of a nice little Japanese kid, who wanted to befriend us so much with his cute blushing face, our Chinese children’s hatred has made us elders completely ashamed.



Source: ChinaSMACK, douban
Well I believe this is a good read after all the recent tension.
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mister_robatto 6th-Feb-2013 04:20 am (UTC)
The title was really misleading at first, but after reading the disclaimer and article, it's the complete opposite outcome that I was expecting.

That said, this is a touching, yet pretty sad article.
nemuyoake 6th-Feb-2013 04:31 am (UTC)
World will be at war, ad vitam aeternam, if nothing is done with young people. We need to reinforce international exchanges of young people through all over the world.
wheresthepaper 8th-Feb-2013 02:32 am (UTC)
I really, really agree with this.
katzsong 6th-Feb-2013 04:45 am (UTC)
Thank you for sharing this wonderful article :)
Although I think Japan also still has its shortcomings in education, but I have always admired on how they educate their children to be independent and considerate towards other people.
I don't really know about the Chinese and I won't pretend that I know. But I have friends whose parents came from mainland China and yeah, it seems that they really hate Japan/Japanese until now and still educating their children to hate.
My country was also a victim of Japan's war crime, with all the propaganda, killings, romusha and jugun ianfu. It was taught in our historical lesson, on mid and high school. But we were never taught to hate. My parents never taught me to hate, and their parents also never taught them to hate. We treat those awful history as a past and focusing on the present and the future. But maybe just like people, every country has their own time and pace to heal from a psychological wound.
I just hope one day, Japan and China will find a way to mend their relationship.
ladyana2j 13th-Feb-2013 05:21 am (UTC)
I am Indonesian and totally agree with all you said. And more, I am muslim too, sometime I felt japanese apply Islam's lesson more than mayor Indonesian muslim do, I adore japanese.
xanithofdragons 6th-Feb-2013 04:58 am (UTC)
Was not expecting that rape mention near the end. O_O

But it is so sad when children are taught to hate even when they might not know much about the reasons.
airihsj 6th-Feb-2013 05:06 am (UTC)
OMG!
THIS. MAKES. ME. TEARY.
I'm a Chinese but I must say I feel lucky because I'm not from China tbvh orz
nikuru 6th-Feb-2013 05:08 am (UTC)
Gosh :(

I've known Japanese and Chinese friends, and it may sound strange, but maybe not as both were adults. My Chinese friend Jiang Kun never talked bad about Japanese people, just told me things were tense and the Japanese fellow I talked to had nothing but hate to spew about Chinese people.

Edited at 2013-02-06 05:09 am (UTC)
haruno21 6th-Feb-2013 05:08 am (UTC)
omg I´m shocked...
they´re just kids, why are they taught to hate?
bea_chan22 6th-Feb-2013 05:09 am (UTC)
Awww, this is such a touching article read! I just hope that one day, the countries that have historical conflicts will have better relations with each other without forgetting to make the offenders accountable on their deeds.
pandapaw 6th-Feb-2013 01:03 pm (UTC)
dumb ways to die :3

i agree this was upsetting to read!
i wish people would get along
doujoushin 6th-Feb-2013 05:14 am (UTC)
Misleading title lol.

Sad contents though - if it's true that's what Chinese kids get taught in school then... idk. Wow. :\
x_stei 6th-Feb-2013 05:16 am (UTC)
Wow. What an.. eye-opening story...

I wish I could get my parents to read this. They've always chastised me about my preferences to anything Japan-related. My dad said one time that if I ever brought home a Japanese guy, he will shoot him -_-;;.

After reading this, I have every hesitance to associated myself with China. There is too much negative hate that is misplaced, especially regarding Japan. I just wish this... discrimination would stop, it's bringing us more bad than good. (By us, I mean people originating from China, regardless of citizenship.)
x_stei 6th-Feb-2013 05:19 am (UTC)
What pains me even more is the implied child abuse in this story. Makes me sick.
asaphira_sachi 6th-Feb-2013 05:23 am (UTC)
Thanks for sharing this great story. It really rings truth to a lot of things about the education and what children are absorbing in the name of nationalism.
rim1789 6th-Feb-2013 05:30 am (UTC)
Thank you for sharing.

That was a sad story, children don't know better but just mimick what they see others adults too...*sigh*
taiki_kou 6th-Feb-2013 05:32 am (UTC)
Thank you for posting this story. It rings true in many way. I am Chinese, born and raised in the US. I attended Chinese school in Caifornia, when I was younger too. I was in the 4th or 5th grade, and all the other kids were years older than me in school (parents started me out early). I guess one day, we passed by that part in history class, about World War II and the Japanese.

But I wasn't really paying attention. I was like, 9 or 10. And was sitting at my desk playing with my Sailor Moon cards. I think the teacher got fed up with me, and asked how I could love something made by the Japanese so much, despite what they had done to our people. The other students turned to look at me, and some made jokes that I was a traitor.

But all I did was shrug and said, "What does it have to do with Sailor Moon? Sailor Moon loves everyone." I excused myself and went to the restroom and didn't come out for 30 minutes or so. The teacher didn't attempt to change my mind again.

And keep in mind, this happened in a Chinese school, in the US. o__o Boggles my mind now that I'm older and can reflect on it.
swanwitch 6th-Feb-2013 07:28 am (UTC)
Personally, I would love to hear about Chinese school in the U.S.
momomoing 6th-Feb-2013 05:35 am (UTC)
Thank you for posting! It was a really good read
hikkishita 6th-Feb-2013 06:02 am (UTC)
this is nice article,,
yet it's shocked me!
the children must be tought by something fun than hateful,,
ann_chibi 6th-Feb-2013 06:28 am (UTC)
thanks for sharing ^-^

wonderful article
snow_meow 6th-Feb-2013 06:34 am (UTC)
thank you for the article.

It's so sad that the next generation are taught to hate someone because of things that happened before they were born.
Why must the hate cycle continue?
All of us should strive to be better and do better.
History is meant for us to reflect on pass mistakes and ensure that they are never repeated in the future.
minhha_lg91 6th-Feb-2013 06:43 am (UTC)
well, what to say, Chinese people hate Japanese and teach their children to do so too but little they know that in other parts of the world there are people hate Chinese too so this thing is so ridiculous.
nicemelody 6th-Feb-2013 11:20 am (UTC)
Well, there are also many Chinese in other countries hating the Chinese from China.
stbluemoon 6th-Feb-2013 06:47 am (UTC)
This story isn't representative of what happens all the time, and there could very well be another one with the roles of the two boys reversed. But it is a good example that illustrates why it is important to teach children from a young age about the importance of judging others as an individual instead of through their race, culture, background, etc.. Good thing that these parents got their wake up call early while there's time to salvage the situation.
mjlights 6th-Feb-2013 07:04 am (UTC)
Indocrinating hate is never a solution. I feel sad reading and wondered what would people teaching hate gain from this? In a way, the older generation should pave the way for better relations, not cause further chaos and antagonism.
pu_ni_yo 6th-Feb-2013 07:08 am (UTC)
THanks for the thoughtful article! I think a lot of Chinese people need to read this.

This kinda reminded me of a text one of my students wrote a few days ago. The topic was "If we all spoke the same languages, then the world would be at peace." To my surprise, a pretty easy topic turned into a bashing and offensive opinion against USA and Japan for "all the wrong they did (and still do) to China". I was astonished, somehow sad but anger fuelled me.

I mean, what are schools and parents teaching to their children nowadays?? Education in China really went down the wrong path and they don't seem to change. I have many friends at university that are always pitying China for the Nanjing case during WWII but they forget completely about massacres from China.

I'm trying to instigate hate for the Chinese, but I just wished they could change their mentality >_<
haratakaki 6th-Feb-2013 07:39 am (UTC)
Well, Philippines and Japan had a dreadful past but that was then and this is now. Those were them and these are we, I could careless. /shrugs Learn from the past and move forward. Or should I say get over it, for Pete's Sake!
bea_chan22 6th-Feb-2013 10:31 am (UTC)
I'm just curious, what is your definition of "get over it"? Because if it means to dismiss everything that happened, then it'll be just counterproductive for both parties, IMO.
citrine047 6th-Feb-2013 07:51 am (UTC)
thank you op for this wonderful read
citrine047 6th-Feb-2013 08:03 am (UTC)
i remember one lesson i learned from a professor of mine : one of the worst things that a parent can impart to his child is to teach them to hate.
for me it's probably the worst. a child's innocence is such a precious thing, it's the adults' duty to protect that. its just so wrong and saddening to see that at such a tender age these children's personality and future has already become dark and tainted.
sad_eva 7th-Feb-2013 12:08 am (UTC)
You managed to put into words how I felt after reading this article. It left me quite speechless and saddened.
le_stupidkid 6th-Feb-2013 08:16 am (UTC)
im japanese and i one of my best friend is chinese he hated japan and act that they're trash but some how we became friends XD


but the chi-child was too much im really sad of the jap-kid :(
u_chai 6th-Feb-2013 08:38 am (UTC)
I'm just curious since you say you're Japanese? You don't feel any negativity in the word "jap"?
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